A Career Woman and A Housewife

Here's the deal, this our blog... This is where we come to write about our lives. The Good. The Bad. The Ugly. And of course, The Beautiful. We welcome anyone to come on in, take a look around and have a few laughs. Nothing makes us happier than nice comments and finding a new BLOG friend. If you can't handle what we have to say, just leave quietly and pretend you've never been here...We will retaliate.

Saturday, February 26, 2005

A Night Out

Do you speak drunkanese? If not, go to the bar, have a few drinks and then come back. Otherwise, you won't know what the @#!* I'm talkin' 'bout!

Career Woman and I went out tonight. I'm home now. These are things I know.

I'm a two beer queer. Only I don't drink beer. I guess you could call me a two liquor queer. Only that doesn't sound as catchy. I caught a fish once. But I guess that wouldn't matter right now. So, I had two drinks. That made me feel inebriated. I know...I'm such a good time.

Career Woman called me earlier. Our blunt conversation went something like this:

Morgan: Nik, let's go to *********'* tonight.

Nikki: uh, ok, I need a break.

Morgan: I have to go home and shower, I just got done tanning, I smell.

Nikki: Alright, go wash your stinky ass, then we'll talk.

Morgan: Whatever, you ignorant bitch.

Nikki: ok, bye

Morgan: bye

(about 3 hours later)

Morgan: I'm ironing my shirt, then I'll be at your house in 15 minutes

Nikki: Shit!

Morgan: What's wrong with you?

Nikki: I can't find my necklace.

Morgan: What necklace?

Nikki: My cute rinestone heart one.

Morgan: oh

Nikki: (continues to curse)

Morgan: (hangs up at some point)

Career Woman picks me up and we're on our way. We are so involed in conversation about our blog that we pass up the road to *******'* and had to take a slight detour. We are so cool.

When we got there, we ordered our drinks and then had a 25 minute conversation about whether or not we should eat meat. It is Friday, you know? I boasted about how I already had chicken today. Career woman recalls the pepperoni roll she had for lunch, but for some reason wants to get religous on me as we sit in a bar. We debate a few minutes longer. Career Woman orders the shrimp platter and a bowl of clam chowder. I had fried mushrooms. This will surely make up for the stupid drunk we will be later. We are such good little catholic girls! See you in heaven!

We joked. We laughed. We talked about OURSELVES. We ordered our second drink.

We ran into a dear old friend and reminisced about her notorious sleepovers. We now know the answer to a comment posted on our Remeber When post. Terry Berry! At this time the second drink officially kicked in. I actually offered my URL to an old friend as an avenue to keep in touch rather than the traditional offering of the phone number. This either means I have officially became technologically savvy or I inadvertently was screaming "I am such a dweeb!" Either way...she took it. Actually, I shoved it into her pocket for her. Whatever.

Now I'm home. I feel a little tired. I had to make a new post before I went to bed because Career Woman threatened my life. She told me I wasn't being a good Mommy to our blog because I only looked at it two times today. By the way, that is why she called me an ignorant bitch earlier. Not because I told her to wash her stinky ass. I still have not found my cute rinestone heart necklace.

Career Woman, here is my post for today. End Conversation.

-Housewife