A Career Woman and A Housewife

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Friday, March 04, 2005

Random Advice for Friday

Okay, did you ever suffer through one of those "open mouth, insert foot" moments, where you just say the worst thing at the absolute worst time? I tend to do that often, but last night was one of those moments that was the ultimate screw up. Truly, I took the cake on ass-things to say to one of your best friends, whom just so happens to be my maid of honor.

I was driving home from school last night. My maid of honor recently moved to Georgia for an awesome promotion and I miss her a lot. We used to live together until she moved at the end of January, and now she is so busy and I am so busy that we barely have time to talk. So I decided to give her a ringy-ding on the hour commute home. I called. She didn't answer. (This is where I received the "biggest asshole of the year" award). I left her a message saying, "I was just calling to see if you were alive since I haven't talked to you in like 8 years, and if you are alive, maybe, just maybe, you could call me back and let me know if you still wanted to be my maid of honor." Not so bad, right? Afterall, I was just joking, and she would know that when she heard it, it would just make her call back faster. Now, here comes the part where I wanted to engulf my entire knee-high boot in my mouth and down my throat to paralyze my voicebox, because I blame my voicebox for me makign me such an asshole.

My celly rings soon after and it's my maid of honor, K.E. I answer, and she says...get this..."Sorry I haven't called you, I'm in the hospital." WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?! World's biggest asshole, right here kids, that's me. She has severe mono. Not just mono, SEVERE mono. And there is something wrong with her liver. Right, so what is wrong with it? They don't know. Isn't that lovely? 8 million dollars a year to tell you "there is something wrong with your liver, but I'm not sure what." Nice. So I wanted to drive my car off the road because I felt so bad. Luckily she is one of the best, most wonderful people I know and she laughed it off, but if I ever wanted to put my foot in my mouth before - this was it. Therefore, my advice...

My advice to you is to shut your mouth and don't assume. We all know what happens when we assume, right? Be good people. And pray for my K.E., she's sicky! :(

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