A Career Woman and A Housewife

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Thursday, May 12, 2005

Maybe They're Dieting?

Bitches and Asses want to get snippy with me! With me! They are barking up the wrong tree right now. As you have probably guessed it, this post deals with my school and it's assmunches of professors and administrators. I had class last night... until 10:10 p.m. Yes, classes do go that late. In hell. Therefore, I ran into one of the directors (a.k.a. Roly Poly) that I had the meeting with on Monday concerning the Bug-Eyed Bitch who gave me a B. (Again, I do not deserve, NOR accept, a B). I stopped him in the hallway and said:

Me: Dr. Blah, have you had a chance to speak to her?
Roly Poly: To who?
Me: (attempting to keep my cool) To Dr. Bug-Eyed (I did say the real name).
Roly Poly: I haven't been here since Monday.
Me: Okay...so that means?
Roly Poly: I have not had an opportunity to speak with her.
Me: (try not to kill him) Okay. (note to self: he must not have a phone at home or in other office - why would they work after hours)

Throughout this process, I have attempted to ground myself via relaxation techniques through deep-breathing, blogging, and m-fing. I feel as though I have done a good job in keeping my cool and not overreacting, in order to not brink "un-professionalism" towards all faculty, but let me tell you, those bitches are walking a fine line with me right now.

After the meeting on Monday, I emailed the the bug-eyed bitch addressing her on each accusation that she threw at me indirectly. Basically, I ripped her a new asshole in the email - that of which I was not embarrassed of, because I forwarded copies of the email to both (two-ton tessie and roly poly) so they knew that I have attempted to set up a meeting with her, on behalf of their request. I was under the impression that these people would actually do their job, as promised and contact the bug-eyed bitch within the next couple of days, rather than the next year. Apparently, I was wrong.

I get to work this morning (to start my to-do list for this wonderful Thursday) and I have two emails from Roly Poly. He was spittin' me some at-ti-tude. That of which, I did NOT appreciate, oh and I let him know. Here is what his email stated (please keep in mind that this email is being sent from the director of the program at my university, this is his job to take care of these matters):

Career Woman,
Dr. Two-Ton Tessie and I explicitly (explicitly was spelled wrong, fyi) told you not to contact the bug-eyed bitch until we had a chance to. I am very upset (and hungry) that you have gone again (apparently I had to decipher that he met "against") our counsel. I feel as though you are not creating solutions to your problems, rather, you are adding to them. (Can someone please tell me how you find a solution to a problem but not doing a damn thing, but sitting on your fat ass all day pretending that you care about your student's educations and eating...something?) Please do not send us any more emails (but we will accept pizzas, sandwiches, ho-hos, and pies and an occasionally milkshake if you will) until we have a chance to contact her. Yours is not the only problem that we are dealing with. (I have to stop typing because I am hungry and feel as though I may just eat the keyboard).

Ok. Ok. Ok. Is he aware that I have spent possibly more money than the other students with "problems" at his assine university?! I deserve for my problem to be addressed in a timely, efficent manner. I have been dealing with this issue for three weeks now, is that not long enough! I responded to his email... I sure did. I was nice, but I was direct. I informed him of what they had told me and that it was their advice to meet with her first prior to any other actions. I attempted. She didn't respond and it is obvious that soon, I am going to have their asses on a platter - I will feed it to my dog and she will more than likely puke them up! So now, I need your advice, do I:
1. Just wait it out and see how long it takes for someone to get back to me?
2. Totally annoy them because it IS their job to handle and deal with our problems?
3. Go straight to the department of education and reem him a new asshole of having absolute degenerates working to better the future leaders?
-Career Woman


  • At 7:53 AM, Blogger Doug said…

    What about options 4:

    Send large chocolate chip cookies to Roly Poly in an attempt to bribe him. Bring differnt cookies each day (that way you are both bribing and annoying at the same time). Then after a preset period of time, initiate choice 3 (hopefully by this time Roly Poly will have died of a heart attack).

  • At 8:05 AM, Blogger A Career Woman and A Housewife said…

    At this point, your option sounds best! Cheers to you - Come to school with me tonight!
    -Career Woman

  • At 8:09 AM, Blogger TrueJerseyGirl said…

    Hm, I was going to suggest something logical, but then I read Doug's comment and well, that sounds like a fabulous idea!

  • At 8:15 AM, Blogger The Dirty South said…

    Save yourself the trip....I have purchased the first flight to the catholic hell they consider a school...armed with my sidekick Starkysha, she will start bobbing her head, taking off her weave, throwin up her hands and shakin her ass...ripping that fat f*ck to shreds and calling it a day...have you ever seen a pissed off Starkysha...bribe her with an apple martini and some fried chicken and she will do what ever you tell her. We will get shit done all the while Roly Poly and his office of assholes will be begging me to pull her off.

  • At 9:02 AM, Blogger A Career Woman and A Housewife said…

    I believe that a Starkysha will do!
    -Career Woman

  • At 9:03 AM, Blogger Erin said…

    i was gonna suggest that you go to the person above these asinine people and talk to them, but the cookie thing sounds much better.

    i feel sorry for you, but now you have me wanting chocolate chip cookies...i might have to go make some...

    and? remember when i saw that big scary spider and ran from my bathroom a few days ago? well, he has been gone since so today i went in there to clean, i look up from cleaning my sink, and here is mr. badass spider scaring the living shit out of me by chillin on the mirror, making him look HUGE (he was obviously at the gym with me last night) and i screamed and ran and have not looked in there since and i need to shower and ahve lots of stuff to do but now i don't want to go in there and i'm the only one home and WHAT DO I DO!?!?

  • At 11:23 AM, Blogger A Career Woman and A Housewife said…

    Okay Erin, maybe you should shower in another bathroom if you have one, if not call someone to kill and remove spider stallone, or bathe yourself over the kitchen sink!
    -Career Woman

  • At 4:55 PM, Blogger Erin said…

    mr. spider is still there
    and i'm still craving chocolate chip cookies


    how did your day go?

  • At 9:30 PM, Blogger Bumbling Bav said…

    I am eating the chocolate chips by the bucket load.

    I say go above them!

  • At 2:00 AM, Blogger LĂ©onie said…

    Erin - make an extra hard chocolate chip cookie in your batch, maybe with cement chips instead of chocolate, and throw it at the spider! Then eat the other (normal) cookies by means of celebration.
    Career Woman - I say fight, and fight dirty. Go above their heads, tell them you're doing it, to scare them. Stage a protest outside their offices, taunting them with cookies. Go on Oprah/Jerry Springer wearing leopard print. Dig a big hole outside their offices and cover it with leaves and branches, then watch as they fall in, laughing raucously. Dare you...

  • At 5:09 AM, Blogger A Career Woman and A Housewife said…


    My day went... well! I tanned on my lunch hour - mucho fun! Getting myself prepped for our engagement photo next saturday, and I'll make sure Housewife posts it for all of your enjoyment!

    EXcellent PLAN!
    -Career Woman

  • At 9:26 AM, Blogger MommaK said…

    Oh maaannnn, I was hoping to read that they kissed your well-deserving ass apologetically and changed your grade to an A+ as we all know they should...

  • At 11:07 AM, Blogger Mike said…

    Definitely #2. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. When I'm in situations like this, I just stop and think of what course of action would get me to respond the way I wanted the other party to respond.


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